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Quote from today 天天天言
我們為神工作的時候，都會有一個遠象。這是神給你的遠象，千萬不要因為注目於眼前的境況，而令你忘記了遠象，否則就只會感到灰心，而失去達成這遠象的決心。
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People always told me that I am a cheerful person, who always laugh so loudly and play so hardly. I feel queer when I was told so because it’s true but not absolutely true. And then many many times, people told me I don’t have be tough and pretentious when I am upset, it’s not necessary for me to laugh all the time. Every time I feel very uncomfortable when I heard about it, but I don’t know how to explain to them that I never tried to use laughters to cover my sadness.
I smile tonight, because I finally found an explanation form Tea that I can use next time when people ask me.
Quote from Esther’s xanga:
I asked him ‘Tea, don’t you ever get tired of smiling?’
‘Sometimes’ he told me ‘sometimes I am in no mood to smile, sometimes making myself smile is tiring. But it is so much easier to smile around people than having to explain a reason for not smiling’
So I asked him ’But you don’t have to pretend with me, you don’t have to smile all the time when I’m around!’
And he said ‘well, sometimes I don’t smile, you just don’t notice’.
Well, sometimes I don’t smile, you just don’t notice.
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我只想大家心平氣和的坐下來溝通, 不知道為什麼最後又迫出怨恨和委屈的眼淚來。 這一次, 我一滴也沒有流, 也分不出是麻木了, 還是累了。 只知道頭很暈, 靈魂像快要飄走似的。
剛巧團契後晚上大家在討論逃避的問題, 若現在我有機會的再逃, 我會毫不考慮的立刻再次出走。 盧盧說在那裡跌倒就要從那裡起來, 我可以站起來面對, 可是我沒有辦法去解決不是我能力範圍的問題。
好累好累, 讓我睡一睡。
